Major Rethinking

Part of my job these days in the Admissions Office is to go around to different academic departments on campus and find stories about students going on to graduate school, career choices, and the unique strengths of our programs. This is a great assignment because I get to hear about all the fun things going on.

It's also a terrible assignment.

It's terrible because I walk out of meetings kicking myself in the butt for having majored in Christian Education instead of History or Secondary Ed. or something else. I truly appreciated the Christian Education program at Wheaton. In fact, I think there were many ways that it was instrumental in my life. As with many things, though, it is much easier for me to point out the things that I missed out on rather than the things I gained.

Without a doubt, my spiritual walk has been edified through classes with Jerry Root, Lyle Dorsett, Barrett McRay, Scottie May, Jim Wilhoit and David Setran. I can tell you stories of how each one impacted me spiritually in a way I cannot even begin to comprehend the full implications of. Jerry Root got me excited about the whole CE program and helped me come to a breakthrough in my identity in Christ while at Honeyrock (a white stone in heaven with my REAL name on it). Lyle Dorsett instilled the desire to be passionate and tireless in the thirst for the Holy Spirit. Barrett McRay put up with my many insecurities and issues as he mentored me through college during our (roughly) monthly lunches. Scottie May taught the value of silence and waiting on the Lord to a guy who had never sat silently before in my life ("Wait... do nothing for 20 minutes?!"). Jim Wilhoit opened the door to the spiritual classics and disciplines ("God as Vindicator" is still a spiritually humbling experience to this day). Dave Setran modeled humility and care for his students (though he did back out on a ping pong challenge once).

The downside is that in many ways I went through the program selfishly. I was not really in a place to learn how to help others, to build strong ministies, or even to produce solid academic work. Instead, I went through the program like one of my wife's foster kids who is craving attention and care. I wanted to receive personally from the program and professors.

And I did. I received tons from the professors and classes. Praise God! I know He is using the love and care from my professors.

Today, though, after having received so much, I look back on my college time thinking more about skills and abilities and academics. If I went through Wheaton starting now, I would be in a very different spot (I hope!). A place where I would be more prepared to take advantage of what a wonderful college like Wheaton has to offer.

Even if I did the CE major again, there would be much more I could learn from it. Instead of taking advantage of the more lax academic requirements, I would want to learn and make as much as possible of the classes.

Lord, help me to see the great good You brought out of my 4-years at Wheaton, rather than look back on all the impossible "if onlys" that I am tempted by!